Female Entrepreneurs: You Are Unique

You are unique. As a female solopreneur or entrepreneur, you need to own what makes you unique. This is so important as it allows you to confidently express yourself and who you are, as it pertains to your business. And I believe this is incredibly important to your growth and success, no matter they type of business you have or your vertical market.

The topic of owning your uniqueness first landed on my radar several years ago, and it was actually via musical theater. Believe it or not, I'm a big musical theater fan. And I was reminded of it again recently. It was in late December when the composer and lyricist Stephen Sondheim passed away at the age of 91. He was prolific. And at that time of his passing, there were a number of articles written about his life and his work, really homages and tributes to  just what a magnificent talent he was.

One of the articles that I came across was in The New York Times where they listed their picks for the 10 top musicals that he created and they included a short video clip for each. And one of the 10 happened to be "Sunday in the Park with Georges,” which is absolutely my favorite Sondheim musical.

In case you are not familiar with the musical, the “Georges” of the title is the French Post-Impressionist painter Georges Seurat best known for his pointillist works of art. The video clip included in the article from "Sunday in the Park with George” is a scene in which Georges is experiencing a creative block. He's stuck. He can't produce anything. And he's conversing musically with his muse, Dot. At one point in their conversation, Dot says to him,

"Anything you do, let it come from you, then it will be new."

Anything you do, you do let it come from you, and then it will be new.  I saw the musical for the first time eight or 10 years ago, and I remember when I heard this, and just being so struck by it. And then watching this scene again, with this phrase, these sentences, spoken by Dot, reminded me of that, especially as it pertains to the work we do as female business owners.

The Limiting Belief Holding You Back

I work with a lot of clients one-to-one, women in particular, who say to me, “You know, somebody's already done it.” “Somebody's done it better than I could ever do it.” “There's no room in the marketplace.” “Why should I even bother?”

To which I always respond,

“There's only one you, with your unique set of experiences, your expertise, your passions, your interests. And if you've not done it, it's not and done before.”

I'm going to repeat that. There's only one you with everything that makes you you, your expertise, where you went to school, where you were born, what you love, and if you've not done it, it's not been done before.

Imposter Syndrome

And if you can really take this in, I think it becomes an antidote to “imposter syndrome.” Now, I'm sure you've seen this phrase as much as I have, especially in the last 12 to 18 months; imposter syndrome is everywhere. Whether it's a on a podcast, in a Ted Talk or blog post or email newsletter that lands in your inbox or on social media, it's become prevalent, so much so that I’d suggest almost everybody suffers from it to some degree. I know I have.

If you can look at this as a positive, and I'm going to try to, if it is prevalent, and if everybody does suffer from it to some extent, that kind of levels the playing field a little bit.

Recently, I had a conversation with a female solopreneur (this was fascinating to me) and the topic of imposter syndrome came up. For her, it was the flipside of what I mentioned earlier -- she's getting ready to launch something that nobody else is doing. And her thought about herself was, well, who am I to do it?

Why Does Imposter Syndrome Take Hold?

I think it’s time to unpack this topic. And the first place to start is by realizing that most people tend to underestimate their own abilities, skills, accomplishments, expertise, everything they do, AND, we tend to overestimate those same things for pretty much everybody else.

How to Deal with Imposter Syndrome

So, what do you do? You need to start addressing this specific tendency. And one way that I would recommend that you do that is when the voice pops up in your head that says, “Hey, you're not good enough. Somebody's already done it. There's no room for you.” Take a breath, pause and say, “Hey, I hear you.”

Because that part of yourself, and I know this has been true for me, is likely afraid of failing. It doesn't want to look foolish. It doesn’t want to show up and not be a success. And that's understandable.

If you can hear that part and say, “Hey, you know what, I’ve got it. I'm going to take care of this and we're going to give it a try. We are going to give it our best,” that will help you begin to get unstuck.

An Exercise as an Antidote to Imposter Syndrome & to Get Clear on What Makes You Unique

I have an exercise that I'm going to suggest that you try to get to the point that you can actually have that conversation with yourself.

Step 1

The exercise is this - grab a pen and paper, or a pen and journal, or sit at your laptop, whatever your preferred mode is, and set a timer for 10 or even 15 minutes. Then start your timer, and when you do, start writing a list of everything you have done in your life that you feel good about, that you're proud of, it can be in your business or career, or not at all related to your work. When you were 10, when you were in high school, any obstacles you've overcome, anything that you did to rise above. Include anything you're passionate about, what hobbies you have, what talents? Are you a marathoner? Do you make origami birds? Do you love to cook and entertain? Do you write, do you paint? Do you ice skate, magnificently. Anything and everything, and you need to keep writing until the timer goes off.

Step 2

Then step back, take a breath, and look at what you've got. Once you've had a chance to get yourself settled again, grab your pen or even a highlighter, or if you're on your laptop, the highlight function works really well for this part of the exercise. And I want you to go back through your list and read through what you have. As you do, circle or highlight whatever jumps out at you. Those things that hit you in the heart. What you might think of as a gut instinct. Highlight all of those things.

Step 3

When you've done that, take another breath, sit, pause. Then, the next step is to take all of those phrases or sentences or paragraphs or bullet points that you have that you've highlighted or circled and put them on a separate piece of paper.

Once you’ve completed that, look at that list with immense appreciation – this is what makes you unique. And whether something obviously pertains to your business or not, it's still what you bring and what makes you you, what makes you differentiate and stand out in the marketplace. You can start feeling confident that what you bring is unique to you, it's yours, and you can bring that to what you're doing.

I think you will find that this will help you show up -- whether you're writing your bio or website copy, whether you're doing social media or giving a talk, show up as yourself and know that what you're bringing differentiates you and helps you stand out in the marketplace.

I hope you'll give this exercise a try. As you do keep the following wise words in mind. They were uttered by the American trumpeter Miles Davis, who said,

"Anybody can play. The note is only 20 percent. It's the attitude of the motherf*&^#r who plays it is 80 percent."

Learn more about my coaching services for female entrepreneurs and business owners.

And, if you’re interested. I’ve put a different spin on this topic here.