How to overcome overwhelm
overwhelm
/ˌəʊvəˈwɛlm/
verb
past tense: overwhelmed; past participle: overwhelmed
bury or drown beneath a huge mass of something, especially water.
Almost every female founder I’ve spoken to recently has said that they’re overwhelmed. They’ve used that exact word.
And with the overwhelm has come an inability to think about their situation and make decisions about what to do (or not).
When everything is urgent, it’s easy to lose sight of what’s most important, what truly needs to be done.
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Free up your brain space.
I’ve been right there with you — drowning under a mile-long list of to-dos.
I’ve learned that the simplest place to start is with a NOW and LATER list. Yes, this may seem obvious.
But the reality is when you’re overwhelmed your brain is not thinking clearly (read: your “executive function” is on the back burner and survival mode takes over).
The first thing you need to do is retake control. So take out a sheet of paper or your journal and put NOW and LATER at the top. Then start.
What needs to be done NOW? For me, this means in the next week, but you choose what feels right to you. List those activities
And what can wait without “the house burning down”? List those activities that can wait. This time put a timeline next to each of them — e.g. 2 weeks; 30 days; 3 months; never.
You may find that in writing the second list, some of the NOW activities can actually be moved over to LATER.
Be ruthless.
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Narrow your focus.
No doubt you’re familiar with the four-quadrant visual of the Eisenhower Matrix. This is your next step once you’ve done the exercise above.
Why? Because doing that first exercise allows you to regain control from the reptile, fight-flight-overwhelm loop.
By doing so you’ll have regained some mental space and be able to look more clearly at what truly needs to get done.
As a refresher, the Eisenhower Matrix is a productivity tool that categorizes tasks into four quadrants:
Urgent and Important — DO NOW
Not Urgent but Important — DO LATER
Urgent but Not Important — GET HELP
Not Urgent and Not Important — REMOVE FROM YOUR LIST
Double-check your work from the first step and get honest with yourself when it comes to where you need help.
If you have a team — even one other resource — what can you hand over to this person so your time is free up for the Urgent-Important activities on your list?
Or perhaps it’s a fellow entrepreneur or friend or a networking group who you can bounce ideas off and get suggestions. This does not need to be a paid resource if that’s not yet an option.
And things that you don’t ever need to do — remove them and really let them go. If you allow them to hang around in your brain as “maybes” that won’t help. They will weigh you down. You need to cut them off.
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To make this work…
In order to effectively act on what you learn by doing the above, you need to add three key mindset shifts and one life-enhancing activity:
Learn to say “no”
Sometimes you end up with too much on your plate because you’re saying “yes” to everything that comes your way — requests for assistance, coffee chats, marketing opportunities, etc. — that when assessed are not truly in your best interest.
As noted above, be ruthless in your analysis of where your time is best spent to get the outcome you desire.
Ditch perfectionism
I get it. I am a recovering perfectionist. Things that would have set my head spinning a few years ago, just don’t anymore. This has been a very good thing.
In order to delegate work that frees you up to focus on your high-value activities, you need to be able to train someone to take on the tasks and be willing to be okay with less perfect results until they’re up to speed.
Plan, train, provide feedback — help that person succeed so you can succeed. It may not be how you would do it. But you never know, it could be better.
Challenge your assumptions
Assumptions get so ingrained that you don’t even realize that you’re operating from them. So the next time you’re overwhelmed and assessing your priorities, do a little self-inquiry.
For example, ask yourself if I don’t do ABC, will XYZ really happen? Challenge your (often unconscious) beliefs. You may hold on to some of them, but at least you’ll do so consciously. The rest, flip them or just discard them.
Breathe
Yes, as the Pearl Jam song title suggests, “Just breathe.” I don’t know about you, but I’ve noticed that when I’m caught up in overwhelm I’m also holding my breath (aka not breathing). Inhale for four counts and exhale for six.
That’s all. It’s enough to get you out of fight or flight mode and back into your body. And it will thank you.
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Take the pressure off.
If you need help determining the right activities to hand over or the type of resource best suited to your needs, I have an exercise for that.
Just send me a message and I’ll share the PDF with you.
Because there is another meaning of the word “overwhelm” — a positive one — where you’re overwhelmed by an emotion such as awe or joy or gratitude.
And it’s the experience of the word that I wish for you.